I knew this would happen, did I not say? but no, they think they know best.
Sorry, let me tell you what I’m talking about.
In the little Cadnam river, which let me tell you, is a quiet little stream without to much trouble or gnomes trying to sell you gnome insurance.
Well, last week I spied it; Barbara Pike! There she was, as bold as brass lying in10 inches of water eating a Ginsters pasty wrapper. I shouted, ‘shoo Barbara, shoo!’, but did she listen? No, she just carried on eating the soft pastry.
I had to alert the tiny things.
And also put up some tiny signs telling all tiny folk what I had seen.
Well, a few moments ago I saw the most chilling site…. tiny clothes on the wobbly jetty, but no sign of tiny swimmers!
I have spent an hour searching along the banks and calling for tiny helpers, but alas nothing.
After I have eaten my supper, I will return with an oil lamp and carry on my gruesome search. I will tell you tomorrow if I find anything, but in the meantime all those in shouting distance of the river, please open your windows and doors and shout, ‘Shooo Barbara!’
Regards
Tiny
